Monthly Volume Goal Achieved

My goal every month is to play at least 200 tourneys a month. I finally reached that goal for the first time this year and finished the month of March with 226 tourneys.

I also made a small profit for the month, but for the year I am slightly down and with the monthly withdrawals I make for bills, savings, and life in general the bankroll has taken a bit of a hit.

I do feel like I am way below expectation for the year, and if my previous stats are at all indicative of my future earning power this is definitely true. I have only made 7 final tables this year, whereas I normally should have about twice as many given my volume based on my previous stats. Then again, the game has definitely gotten tougher, with less fish and more pros, and more of the recreational players utilizing training sites, and poker forums, and books, and software.

So again the vicious mental cycle begins with the vast unknowingness of what my future will hold. I can say that I have a 13th, a 23rd, and a 27th under my belt these last two days in tourneys where first place was well over $10k, and in all 3 I either got it in ahead or was coolered. So I like how I am playing - now I just need to run good late.

Another sighful Sunday

I am always somewhat amazed at how sickened I continually get when I have another horrendous day at the virtual felts. One would think after playing this game for so long now, that I would get used to it. But I don't.

I played 15 tourneys today. I didn't cash any. I made a couple of minor mistakes - but nothing major and just didn't run well.

With my need to withdraw money for the World Series and make my monthly withdrawals, I am getting worried about feeling the bankroll pinch again soon, but all I can do is keep playing well, and hope that I go on a heater soon.

I actually feel that I am running way expectation for the year. But I also feel like the games are definitely getting tougher and tougher so I am not sure how much my expectation actually is.

New Culinary Experiences

I stayed up late last night/this morning watching one of my poker buddies take down a tournament and again woke up with less than my usual 8 hours of sleep, so instead of putting in a session when I wasn't feeling mentally at my best... I took another day off. Yeah yeah, surprise surprise.

Charmian was supposed to have the day off, but she wants more experience doing hysterectomies so she went in and is doing some of those. She also expected to be off by 6 (turns out she won't be home until at least 8 which also is no surprise) so I went to the store and bought some steaks and then our veggie box came today so I deciced to pair the steaks with a potato/red pepper/red onion mixture as well as making the cauliflower.

I am not a cauliflower fan at all. But I tried something new tonight instead of steaming it or pureeing it and hiding it in something else or dousing it in some sort of cheese sauce which is usually the only way I have found it palatable. Tonight I simply drizzled it in olive oil, added some fresh garlic, pepper, salt, and lemon juice and then just baked it for like 30 minutes at 400 degrees. And I was impressed at how good it was. Shouldn't have surprised me that simple food tastes so good, but I was still surprised.

I am not sure what we have in store tomorrow, but I know that I will be back at the virtual tables on Sunday.

Not a lot to update

Just a standard week. I put in full sessions on Tuesday and Wednesday, played well, no results. The only difference this week is that I am still running high on confidence from last week's win so I haven't been whining or moping as much.

I am not playing today because I am just tired. My wife got to "sleep in" until like 7:30 today. Usually I don't even notice when she wakes up because I am in deep sleep, but today she woke up late enough that she woke me up to, but early enough that I am still tired. So instead of playing an afternoon session, I took the morning off, deposited some checks, and basically have just been lazing around surfing the web and watching tv. Tonight I will do a couple of hours of coaching for a student who won some lessons through pwnage. Tomorrow and Saturday my wife has off so that means I am off too.

I am hoping for a nice Sunday score, but will just put in my play and let my results follow.

Back to it

So between taking time off to clean the house and yard, having my friend Adil come up for the weekend, and taking yesterday off to spend time with the wife, I haven't played since my win last Tuesday.

I know I take too much time off, but I feel refreshed and am excited to play again. I am sure I will bemoaning my luck soon enough, but it is always nice to come back playing in the correct state of mind. I also feel extremely fortunate that I am able to just say "meh I don't feel like working tomorrow, so I won't."

I played an afternoon session today and whiffed it but every hand I busted out on was completely standard so I have no real bad feelings. I was asked to play volleyball again tonight so I am going to do that and then tomorrow and Wednesday should be full schedule playing days.

I also got a week trial pass at a local gym so I am going to try my best and get there at least 3 days this week.

Psyche restored

So as is often the case after a big win of mine, I take the day off and just get some of the crap that I leave undone when I am grinding done. I cleaned the house, made some pinto beans, some breakfast potatoes, and chicken chiliquiles.

We recently started getting fresh veggies from local farms delivered to our house so I am thinking how I am supposed to cook the kale and red chard we got, but I am not a big leafy veggie guy so I can't think of anyway that will be appetizing so it will probably just stay in the fridge until I throw it out.

Anyhoo, I can't believe how much better I feel simply by getting that huge weight off my shoulders last night. I also realize how fortunate I am - that was by far my longest downswing ever, and I know that many many other pro players have gone through much worse. So I also realize that I need to continue working on my mental toughness.

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

I took down the $162 50k guarantee on Stars for over $17k. So the downswing is officially over. Scary thing is that huge huge win just brings me back to even for the year.

My friends who I talk to on vent are also happy campers because they don't have to listen to whine and bitch for at least a little while now.

Tomorrow I clean up the house, do my state taxes and maybe play a night session.

Still leaking

I continue to plug on, I continue to get frustrated. I did final table something today but it was the smallest tourney I play and so even with a final table I ended up losing money on the day.

I did have people watch me play today and the consensus is that I am playing well and just not running well so that is somewhat of a relief as well.

So I will continue to keep plugging away this week, and just continue to keep re-evaluating and hopefully (pretty please?) this thing will swing around soon.

Still can't break through

Poker continues to go poorly results wise. I still feel like I am playing very well overall (although I have been making some "screw it" mistakes) but I just can't get that one elusive big score to break me out of the slump.

The one silver lining is that even though I am down over $10k for the year, even though I am still making my monthly withdrawals, my bankroll is not totally depleted. In previous times it is very likely I would have tried to chase my losses at bigger cash games and blown through even more of my roll. But this time I have maintained my composure and my bankroll and so I still have enough that I can play up to $300 tourneys which means I still give myself a shot everyday I play to make that $15k+ score.

It is going to happen... it's just a matter of when.

Actually got out of the house

I played an afternoon session today and then was invited to sub in for a volleyball game tonight so I jumped at the opportunity. I am out of shape, and haven't played for ages, but it was fun. And even better, my knee didn't really bother me at all while I was playing - it is hurting now, but it didn't hurt while I was jumping.

Tomorrow I will finally play a full afternoon and evening session.

Back to it

This will be the last weekend in a long time that my wife actually has time off, so we enjoyed it. We slept in, got some gardening done, I made a really nice meal last night, and then today we had a late breakfast and I didn't start playing until the Sunday million started at 1:30.

I again am playing well. I cashed 4 out of the 10 tourneys I played. But I still just can't finish anything out. Losing flips, not getting paid with my monsters, same old same old. I am actively working on stopping the whining, and the focusing on how crappy I am running and am really trying to just focus on results and then go from there.

I am not planning on doing a whole lot interesting this week other than really trying to put in some volume, so I will just keep plugging away and hopefully bink something off soon enough.

1/2 timing it

I have put in 3 afternoon session this week and am making the money a lot and feel like I am playing super well but I haven't had the mental fortitude to play a night session because I keep almost making a final table, bubbling it, and then being too frustrated to put any more volume in.

A 19th, a 15th, and today a 14th and it just is eating me up. If I were giving advice to myself I would tell me to keep playing well, don't let the frustration make you spew, and the results will come. But being in the midst of a string where it just seems no matter I do I can't break through, makes me wonder if the results ever really will come.

Vacation Pics

One of my law school professor's writes a blog and also travels pretty frequently so when I saw pics of her trip to Tobago a year ago I kept it in my mind that that looks like a nice place to go.

So with that as basically my only guide I convinced my wife and her family that for her February vacation we should go to Tobago. The flights were relatively cheap so we booked it. I found a nice condo directly on the beach on the Caribbean side of the island.

We luckily ended up on a gorgeous beach that was very uncrowded, soft sand, warm water, waves that were fun enough to play in but not so huge that any of us ever felt nervous, and a long stretch of calm open water so that we could take nice long swims. For our family at least this is heaven.

We did spend one day traveling to a couple of different beaches that had better snorkeling so we got to see some more of the island, but after that day we realized how much we enjoyed just relaxing at our own digs on the beach, with our own pool to rinse off, so we stayed put. And enjoyed the sunsets and cocktails from our own deck, watched the locals pull in their fishing nets, and just had a really really relaxing and good time.

Back Home

After over a week of rest and relaxation, I have finally made it back home. We went to Tobago for a week with my wife's family and had a great time. I will try and post pics and a recap later this week.

For now, I am pooped after the long ass drive from L.A. back to Sacramento. Tomorrow I will get back to work.